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Saturday, September 29, 2007

my list

smith's lane
Originally uploaded by kristalynn.
the past few weeks i haven't been able to find the time to get anything done. once i think i'm done for the day, having sent off a final email at 2 am comprised of the client's 432nd round of changes, i'll crawl into bed and realize that i didn't pay my quarterly taxes.

"make lists," urges my boyfriend.

"no," i say. "that's stupid. i hate lists."

he shakes his head and pulls out his moleskin notebook. i see him write the word "bananas". right under "yogurt".

a friend of mine always points out how i allegedly hate everything. he mocked me this past week while having crantinis on his balcony.

"no it is," i defended. "the tiburon is a stupid car."

"uh huh. what else? what else is stupid?"

"you know what else? the pontiac vibe. that's stupid as well. vibe. stupid."

"you hate everything."

"no i don't. i don't hate licorice."

"uh huh," he crossed his arms. "what else?"

i rest my head against his brick wall. and i made my first list:

"i don't hate cobblestones."

"mm hm. that's good."

"i don't hate, um, shawn rosengarten."

"my co-worker?"

"um hm. i don’t hate him. he makes me laugh. i don't hate the cinema. i don't hate frogs. i also don't hate toads. i'll pick up a toad. i don't hate airplanes. i don't hate burritos. i don't hate los angeles… i don't hate cheap champagne. i don't hate flip flops. i don't hate eduardo."

"your car?"

"mm hm."

"that's a given."

"i don't hate colin farrell. i don't hate the internet. i don’t hate luigi’s backyard. i don’t hate crooked teeth. and i don’t hate that bird that found that pink boa and decorated your eaves trough with it.”

“that bird lost all her babies.”

“i know. i think that’s why she went crazy and took that pink boa. i don’t hate wind. i don't hate portland. i don’t hate faux fur. and i don’t hate sea urchins."


At October 01, 2007, Blogger Anne said...

What a happy post! Has someone been yelling at you or something ;)

At October 01, 2007, Blogger sass said...

no. believe it or not, no one has yelled at me for quite a few days...

and kell, i'm sorry i didn't reply to your last comment. the rock star does still live there - he was on SNL last saturday! again! - but that's the building where things get done. THIS is the building where people sit around and mope about how entitled they think they are.

At October 03, 2007, Anonymous Buxom S. said...

Tiburons suck a$$...

At October 04, 2007, Blogger Kell said...

Ah - that clears things up. Ok. Now for a short list of things I don't hate:

Leaving work at the end of the day
chocolate and raspberries
my new Cole Haan Shoes - decadent, but it makes leaving work at the end of the day even more pleasant
the prospect of "I can get a maid any time I want!"
new socks

That's not a bad list.


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