ooh baby, you're the one

Originally uploaded by kristalynn.

i work as a consultant. as a result, i have to care about a company very intensely, for a short period of time.

as soon as that period of time is over, the subject matter is promptly purged from my memory. this happens for two reasons: 1) my tiny pea brain has to make room for the everyday things like turning off the oven and 2) the content is usually painfully boring.

and i'm generally made to sign pieces of paper to never, ever speak of such boring things. pity.

in the past ten years, the only interesting things i've learned is how a plane flies (wow) and the inner workings of the pharmaceutical industry (whoa).

and while doing training for the pharmaceutical companies, i learned how we breathe. the thing we take so much for granted.

did you know that we breathe as a result of our chest cavity expanding? this expansion lowers the pressure in the chest cavity which causes air to rush into lungs.

not the other way around - meaning our chest doesn't expand as a result of us breathing air into our lungs.

when i learned this, i realized not everything is as it appears. and that i knew i had to be wary of what i thought i knew...


this last trip to new york, i was scheduled to stay at the apartment i rented out last year - the yoga hut.

because the yoga hut is unique and temperamental, the owners deemed me a 'preferred client' due to tender manner in which i tended to it.

"krista, because you're low maintenance and we need responsible people in here, we'd rather have you than anyone else."

that is, until someone offered them more money.

they reneged and hoped i understood. and i slept on a libidinous friend’s couch as a last resort.


earlier this spring, i found myself making a difficult decision about whether or not to accept a job offer and move to the other side of the country. the decision was a lot harder than i would have ever thought, and it is for that reason that i accepted the job and then woke up the next morning in a start and rescinded my acceptance.

part of what made the decision so difficult was i would be moving to where my sister and niece live. if i didn't move, we'd remain 5000 miles apart.

before i had a chance to inform my sister that i was actually not going to be coming, she told me that an apartment in her building was opening up. the owner, her friend, let's call him botticelli, was traveling for a year. the rent was something ridiculous. low.

i felt as though i had made a grave error.

"i'll tell botticelli you decided not to come..." she dolefully said to me. "he has a friend who's interested..."

i was silent. i was scheming. "no... let me ask the company if i can change my mind again. this apartment changes everything. let me know if his friend takes the place."

i got a week extension from the company. they knew it was a big decision and were very accepting of my vacillating nature.

botticelli emailed my sister. he said he didn't feel comfortable with anyone else staying at his place and that he was waiting for me. he felt that i was the one who was meant to be there. he envisioned my niece sleeping over while he was traveling in india. it was "the right thing". it was too good not to be true.

until he placed an ad on craigslist and started to get offers way over his asking price. i was no longer "the one". he hated being 'heartless', he said, but that extra money would go a long way in india.

botticelli told me he met so many great people in the posting that he was going to invite them all to a cocktail party.

he also said he was looking forward to meeting me during one of my visits when upon his return.

i informed him that we had met on at least three different occasions.

nice to know i can be your discount "one".