i'll take it

margarita & tat
Originally uploaded by kristalynn.

several years ago, i mustered up the courage to ask a friend who was responsible for doing her hair. it was much nicer than mine.

"oh, it's "M", she was surprised that i didn't know.

"who? do i know her?"

"she does the hair for the cast of the french version of the office."

"oh..." she was out of my hair’s league. but i bravely asked for the number anyway.


M always seemed to run behind schedule for my appointments. the first few visits consisted of me waiting on her red velvet couch, having to listen to a 45 minute conversation between her and a metrosexual about the customization his fauxhawk. his high energy and her enthusiasm drained what little i had. when it came my turn to sit in the chair, a pale, pallid, exhausted, and ugly person stared back at me.

"you dyed your hair too dark," she gently counseled.

"yeah..." i sighed. the dark circles under my eyes seemed accentuated.

these awkward exchanges continued for months. until one day when i showed up with a little extra energy and she wasn't running behind schedule.

"you got a little sun. and your hair isn't as dark. you look good," she said.

"thanks," i said. "i really like the dark hair on you though. it works."

she proceeded to tell me how she saw felicity huffman during her recent trip to mexico. i feigned thrill. and noticed my smile lines.

and then she divulged a friend's sexual orientation temporary derailment.


"i heard you had a breakthrough with M," said my friend who gave me the number. "she had been waiting so long."

i gushed. "we talked about a momentary lapse of gayness..."

i catsat and moved into her apartment when she and her boyfriend returned to mexico for 6 weeks. and i even appreciated it when, after trying to coordinate a sunny afternoon beverage through a facebook thread, she barked "NOOO COFFEE" at us.

did she talk to the metrosexuals like that?

someone cared about split-endy me.