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Thursday, April 27, 2006

holy cannoli

i used to live in new york, and i miss it tons. i still have a few friends there that i try to meet up whenever i'm in town. this last time when i was packing, i got a small pang of melancholy because i thought of one friend whom i would not be meeting up with anymore. this is due to a fight over a USB wireless adaptor.

obviously it's more complicated than that. but i stopped packing and asked my boyfriend if it was okay to feel sad.

"of course it is. maybe you can try to patch things up."

"no…" i said thinking of all the eggshell walking and backpedaling i had to do with him. "…his last email told me to 'fuck off'."

several years ago, i stayed with this friend for a few days. he informed me of a famous nearby italian pastry shop where the cannoli were so good that coppola was known to order them for his film crew. we trotted over and sampled a few. they were, of course, to die for.

i think.

i'm not the biggest cannoli fan. i have trouble with sweet cheese.

in any case, on my last day there, he went out and bought a box of these reputable cannoli and silently placed them on the kitchen counter.

"mmm..." i said, and continued doing what i was doing.

a few days later i got a scathing email from my friend who was incredulous at my rudeness of leaving behind the cannoli gift basket. "i went out and bought that especially for you! i CAN'T eat that stuff. don't you know that i don't eat white sugar? they ALL went in the garbage!"

of course i felt like a heel. i stayed at his place and left behind a baker's dozen of world-famous brooklyn cannoli. why, those could have fed at least two grips on a coppola shoot.

it just would have been so much more simple had he told me that they were for me.

we have people in our lives for a myriad of reasons. not much can explain the chemistry between people. but when a cannoli keeps you from speaking for close to a year, things should be reevaluated.

sadly, the cannoli didn't get its message across. it had to be the wireless adaptor:

"I am asking you kindly now to send me back the wireless adapter with the cord. I went out of my way to bring it to you and have been nothing but a friend to you. I helped with that apartment, set up the internet for you and you are being a total bitch to me. I will make your life hell if you don’t send it to me."

so no, it's not worth patching up.


At April 28, 2006, Blogger frogpajamas said...

priceless. the tiny dessert that launched a thousand war emails.....

At April 28, 2006, Blogger Kell said...

And why, I ask - when the cards are on the table, and we know full-well what to expect - do we still try?

It's because we have high hopes. (And there's a good reason Hope rhymes with 'dope.')

At April 28, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...

OH MY GOD, STOP WITH THE ADAPTOR STORY BECAUSE IT MAKES ME LAUGH SOOOOOO HARD EVERY TIME I HEAR ABOUT IT. "Just KEEP the adaptor." Oh God, stop. It's sooooooooo funny and I don't know why. -kjc

At May 06, 2006, Blogger jim said...

holy usb wireless cannolis batchick!


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